Tuesday, February 4, 2014

A Father's Love

     I am in the Early Childhood Development field where I currently work in the public preschools around the Coachella Valley. I have worked with and have been surrounded by the most wonderful of families in whom I care so much for (in and outside of the education system). Our society has had a recent uproar of torn families, it appears. I am unsure of the reason as to how and why the studies over the last 50 years has had a rise of divorces and fall of wonderful homes. According to an American owned website, "In the United States, researchers estimate that 40%-50% of all first marriages, and 60% of second marriages, will end in divorce." Let us face it, many of these broken homes have experienced the pain of an absent father, few know what it is like to appropriately give love to their family and plenty have not been introduced to Jesus Christ.

     So what is the issue here? Is it that we are lazy and fail to work out our relationships during the harshest of seasons? Could it be that since the recent decline of the American economy that we all decided to focus more on our finances instead of our homes? Or has there been a transformation of major behavioral modality to where we have handed over our morals and standards to the media and are now in charge of transforming our homes instead of it being the responsibility of the adults? I can try to make up all the excuses in the world as to why families are in the midst of a major battle, but when I ask God for His answer it is made clear that no matter how we try to rid the problems, the only way is through a Father's Love.

((The examples listed below are fictional, but inspired by true events))
     A young child's biological father never gave him or her the desired attention. In result, the child is now twenty-five and is still searching for love through the seven failed relationships they have previously experienced. Another child's father chose to start another family with a woman he has had an affair with. This leads the child to grow up having trust issues and a negatively corrupt outlook on life. The biological father of the following children has abused the mother and neglected his children. One might think the mother has finally found a man suitable to love and care for her and her children; instead, she has continued the cycle in searching for the same type of man thus leaving the mother and the children dissatisfied. Now all grown up, two have been put in jail for child abuse and the oldest has had two failed disappointing marriages. In today's frequent scenarios I developed in this paragraph, I know that this similarly happens all around the world.

     So, how do we offer help to those amidst a difficult time? In God's word, it reads that we are all born with sinful natures.

"Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity. And in sin my mother conceived me." (Psalm 51:5)

We'd all like to believe that we are born with a perfect soul and that we grow up with a pure heart. Scientifically and biblically, that is untrue. I remember watching an experiment titled, "Don't Eat The Marshmallow" lead by speaker Joachim de Posada. He placed 5 children, from what appears the ages of four to seven years old, in seperate rooms and promised that if they wait fifteen minutes that he would give them a surprise (chocolate topping, an extra marshmallow, etc). Every single one of them struggled with delayed gratification because they had the temptation right in front of them. One little girl would gently lick the marshmallow, another would smell the marshmallow profusely (quite hilarious actually), one of the boys would nibble at the marshmallow, another would just stare at it and wiggle in his chair and the last would take close examination of the marshmallow throughout the time. All were tempted and at some point could not handle the pressure. This study was developed to show that children experience delayed gratification until proper instruction (by a respectable adult) and can determine the outcome of their future successes and failures. Where do children pick up this habit? Naturally, we can all be impatient to have our needs (regardless of what they are) met at that point in time thus leading us to act upon it in a healthy or in a destructive manner. How do we show children? From experience, it is not only in what an adult says to a child ("Do as I say not as I do"), but in instruction of how the adult lives. In that same way, adults need to be taught the gift of love so they can teach their children and so on. Now, for those who are struggling in their relationships; is there any help out there that we can offer them?

     We can have more programs that can assist single parents and provide food and clothing for their families. Perhaps we can give more harsh punishments toward the abusers so that the families can be safe. We can try to bulldoze the rundown communities and rebuild the town to its previous glory (safe, natural and historical). However,  I have a hard time imagining any type machinery strong enough to rebuild the sacred walls that were torn down from the heart's of our people. From the looks of it, not any money in the world is powerful enough to heal the wounds of the abusers and their victims.
We all need proper instruction (in the similar fashion that adults teach children) on how to live abundant and plentiful lives and who better to teach us than Jesus Christ.

     May I offer a solution? A Father's Love! What is missing is not the welfare programs (although they do offer some help) or a clearance sale of the finest medicated drugs, but the lovingkindness of One that sees your internal mess and yet continues to enrapture you with His love. It is the everlasting gift of salvation through the understanding and appreciation of the gospel lived out by the ever so loving, Jesus Christ.

"The Lord's lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness" (Lamentations 3:22-23)

     In my experiences with Christ, I can honestly say it has been the most fulfilling and eye opening relationship I have ever been a part of. The fact that He lived such a beautiful life, was crucified for the sins of all mankind and made such a powerful entrance in resurrecting from the dead still has me chasing after Him in all the seasons of my life. I am captivated and I want more. I need more of Him: more wisdom, more humility and more love. It is the relationship I have always wanted that no one on earth can offer me. I suppose that the heart of our issues today has only one perfect recipe for a more promising life and that is through Jesus.



God Bless The World.


Sources:
http://www.divorce.usu.edu/files/uploads/Lesson3.pdf

The Holy Bible (NASB)

http://www.ted.com/talks/joachim_de_posada_says_don_t_eat_the_marshmallow_yet.html